Batman V. Superman: Dawn of Justice- My Re-write

Back in the day, I re-wrote Man of Steel to try and fix its problems. Now let’s pull that same exercise and let’s re-write

Batman V. Superman

A couple of things to remember as we move forward: I actually did not think this was a bad film, nor do I believe Man of Steel was bad. Both films had some amazing plot points and some great scenes that really leave a lot of other Superhero movies in the dust. As a devout DC fan though I think its worth saying that there were maybe a few points that they could have changed that would have made the movie a bit more acceptable to fans and a bit more accepting to critics. 

The Goal here is mostly to make the story more coherent and to add/ take away ideas that made the movie a little too controversial in the eyes of fans and critics. This is not meant to be a full script but more of a scriptment or general idea as to how things go. The dialogue segments are there to support what I want to have happen in the scene. So, with hindsight being 20/20, let’s jump in.

Cause Srsly. How many times do I have to watch the Wayne
Parents get Shot?

We start in a dreary field. A sarcophagus is in the distance and walking towards it is a man carrying a bouquet of flowers. His black trench coat flows over the yellowing grass beneath his feet as dead leaves continue to fall off the trees around him. In the man’s mind, we hear his memories being replayed. A muffled voice demands the pearls around the woman’s neck. A punch is heard, followed by a gunshot. A woman screams. A second gunshot. A young boy shouts at the top of his lungs for his mom and dad to wake up. The man steps into the sarcophagus and places the flowers in a vase built into the wall. The camera pans away revealing the tomb markers of Thomas and Martha Wayne.

Bruce (voice-over): I had a dream. I fell into a cave in my parents’ home. It was dark, damp. The air was rancid. The bats in the cave, they carried me to the light. It was a beautiful lie...

3 years ago. Earth is introduced to the Superman.

This scene moves quite like it did in the movie as it stands. For the uber fans in the audience, I would have Bruce address the girl by her name which would be printed on a locket as “Carrie”.

Title screen: Batman Superman: Dawn of Justice. The “v” is taken out as the fight between the two is not an important part of the movie and the “v” adds a false sense of what it’s all about.

Present.

Zach Snider said that Jimmy didn't have a big role because
there's just not enough room for him in the universe.
False.
There is ALWAYS room for Jimmy Olsen. I set out to prove that.

A desert convoy drives up to the gates of an impound somewhere in Afghanistan. “Hey, I got them in the back,” says one of the terrorists. The man at the gate looks at his clipboard. “They get brought in from out here”. The thugs throw two bodies out of the back of the van, one male the other female. Both of the hostages have bags over their heads and their hands are tied behind their backs with ropes. Forcibly, a couple terrorists grab them and walk the two into the compound then pull the bags off their heads revealing Lois and Jimmy Olsen. They are standing in front of the main terrorist guy.

Olsen: “Lois, what have you gotten us into?

Lois: chill jimmy, I’ve got this. (Lois walks confidently up to the terrorist and sits upon a pillow in front of him).

Olsen: (muttering) yeah, but who’s got you?

Lois then starts interviewing the terrorist. He is truly amazed at them and starts laughing when Lois starts asking interviewing questions. The terrorist only invited the two so he could use them as ransom. Lois- a multi-Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist- would fetch good money. He orders jimmy to be chained in the courtyard while Lois is going to the private chambers with the terrorist.

Signal watch already? We can't
expect Superman to have done nothing
for the past 3 years. The signal watch
demonstrates that time is still moving
and Superman has been doing Superman
stuff.

Jimmy is tied to a post and one of the terrorists spits on him. Jimmy presses a button on his Superman watch and after several seconds of taunting, Superman appears and knocks out all of the terrorists in the courtyard. As Superman is freeing Jimmy from the zip-ties, Jimmy explains where Lois was taken. Superman gives instructions to Jimmy to leave as soon as Lois gets back up.

Segment from "Superman: Earth One vol. 2".
Superman doesn't take lightly to people terrorizing
his friends and family. This Terrorist guy?
 He's totally in Alaska right now.
That decision will come to bite
 Clark later.

Superman crashes through the building and lands in front of the terrorist who is holding a knife to Lois’ neck. Superman winks to Lois and she loosens her grip on the terrorist's arm. Superman looks up at the terrorist with hate in his eyes and they charge through a wall. Jimmy comes down the stairs and sees’s Lois, yelling for her to get up so they can take the trucks and get away.

As a truck rolls away from the site, another enters the area. A bald man in a business suit steps out of the truck. A few of the terrorists are starting to regain consciousness and they start apologizing to the businessman for failing.

Lex: don’t worry, you are actually going to fulfill exactly what I was hoping you would. Gentlemen?

A couple goons pull open the tarp at the back of the truck and produce a giant heat laser. A man flicks it on. We see a laser. We hear screams.

Part 2 coming soon!

What do you guys think of this beginning? Better? Worse? Same? let me know in the comments. Thanks for liking my Facebook Page and sharing this with a friend and remember to always be your best self.